J's IUD came out. It was sort of awesome, but I don't think I ever want one.

So I'm trying to cool my heels this cycle. The first month I tried to conceive, I was charting and driving myself totally nuts. The second month -- last month -- I ended up having a 102 degree fever for the time when I'd have normally ovulated, and had an anovulatory cycle. In order to not keep worrying myself all the time, I am going to temp every OTHER cycle, rather than every cycle. I think this will keep me from being totally nuts and obsessive, while still keeping track of my fertility enough that I can feel confident in my ability to conceive.

I had a nice, ovulatory cycle the first cycle I tracked, so I don't think ovulation is something I need to worry about. But still, the worries are always there. What if I'm infertile? What if my husband is? Yikes! I had what I assume to be a very early miscarriage last fall -- a late period, tender breasts, and then a positive test followed an hour later by heavy bleeding -- but that doesn't stop me from concocting scenarios in which either of us could have BECOME infertile since.

To make matters worse, my periods have been really odd since I stopped hormonal contraceptives. They have, in the past, been heavy but rather short. Now, I bleed lightly for 1-2 hours a day, every day, for about a week. It's hardly a damn period, and even 2 years ago when I stopped hormonal contraceptives for a few months (I wasn't partnered at the time), I didn't have this sort of weirdness. So even though I spent all my periods before wishing they'd be lighter and less crampy, I'm now wishing for the old-style, cramping, tampon-soaking period.

By the way, I will never tell you that I'm about to give you "TMI." You're reading a blog about conception, pregnancy, and birth. These things all involve bodily fluids, physical processes, and sights, sounds, and smells that might not always be pleasant. If you have an aversion to hearing about those, what on EARTH are you doing reading this blog? I always hate in pregnancy communities when women pre-emptively apologize for including too much information about their discharge or periods or mucus plugs. We're all grownups. I want to talk about birth honestly, and I can't be honest without talking about my body and the things it does. I hope no one has an issue with that, but if you do, don't expect me to go changing things for you.